BioPhys_Kim's corner of the universe

So there has been no new post for a while. I'm actually using my slight headache tonight to catch up with a few things online so I might make a couple of posts (but doubtful). I doubt anyone reads this anymore anyway but I'm going to start using it as a place to try and express certain thoughts but since my mind is so nonlinear, we'll see how it goes. But before I get serious and give opinions I'll sum up the last six months.

( Marriage... )

( Vacation and awesome work! )

And now we're back to school (although I'm only auditing one class this term and not doing any TAing). Hopefully soon I'll make a post about something that I've been thinking about and learning about over the past few months (mostly in a reading posts and thinking introspectively kind of way). Specifically, the realization that I am totally a feminist and that is cool and awesome.

I'm posting this for two reasons. One, cause I haven't posted in awhile and should update you (the end is near!! Yay!), and two cause I got my first mean anonymouse (I feel like I'm a real blogger now). I was going to screen their comment, but I don't really like doing that and they brought up a semi-valid point (amongst a bit of bleh).

( Serious, dull matters )

( Post of GLEE! )

Edit: Because this page is possibly linked to from somewhere off my wedding site I have friends locked some of the posts. I apologize but they were really only intended for my venting purposes and I wouldn't want someone to get the wrong idea when I'm just letting off steam.

I have a shitload of work to get done and yet I’m sitting here writing a blog post. Why? Well, for one, it’s better than work. For two, I’m actually waiting for a bunch of people to get back to me about stuff so I can move on. For three, I don’t have everything I need here today. Four, I’m bored. This entry will really be a bunch of rapid fire things.

( Enter long, ranty sections )

After posting such a depressing post I’d thought I’d post a nice uplifting one. I’ll start by giving out the link to my fiancé James’ blog. You can find it at http://blog.foolsjourney.ca/ and so far he updates his blog far more frequently than I do. And his is probably much funnier than mine. So go read it! We should be putting up a wedding website on his site, hopefully before very long.

( Yay Christmas!! )

And yes, I am still avoiding work. :-) Although it's partly because I can't do assigned reading with a textbook that hasn't arrived yet.

Well surprise, surprise, I went a really long time without posting. I wish I could say that I won’t do it again but I can’t. I have such grand ideas of regular posts and I just can’t seem to take the time to write a nice post. I can’t even seem to bother to post a short one. So why am I bothering now? Easy. Because I’m avoiding work. Ahh, you say, she’s exhibiting a classic behaviour, especially for a student. But I’m worried that my recent work avoidance is more serious.

( Into the breach )

Can I just say, that while my title can be a funny joke if used occasionally, it’s not that funny when multiple people ask you. I’m just saying. I don’t know if I realized how negative my last post was until I got those nice replies from people. Thanks for being nice. I appreciated those comments, as I don’t think even I realized how frustrated I was by everything until I wrote it all out.

( Moving... )

Okay, I admit it. I have a fondness for cheesy disaster movies. Cheesy action movies as well, but especially cheesy disaster movies. And NBC recently aired what is possibly the cheesiest action movie I’ve ever seen (although I’m sure there are many more I haven’t). ( I don't think Apocalypse means what you think it means... )

I keep meaning to update more often but at least right now I have an “excuse”. ( See excuse here… )

( Wedding! )

( I occasionally have fun. No, really! )

EEEEKkkkkk! I don't think I can emphasize how freaked out and stressed I am at this very moment. Why you ask? Well, as most of you know by know, my boyfriend popped the question on April 9th and I am now engaged (I would have posted about this before but I was trying to catch my RL friends in "person", i.e. over MSN before I put it on LJ). So we've been trying to plan a wedding in Fredericton (July 21, 2007) while liveing in Halifax. Not easy whatsoever. Although my dad makes a pretty good wedding planner.

Other source of major stress? We put an offer in on a condo townhouse this afternoon. I leave for Seattle for a week on Saturday. I have panic attacks about major trips anyway let alone a trip during our reviewing period. *Freaks* It's a gorgeous condo that we first saw last week but didn't seriously consider cause it's the first one we saw. He have since seen others (one of which was a dump) and been to the area where others are available and have not seen anything that even remotely compares (all new flooring, kitchen, main floor windows, paint, bathrooms, etc....). It is the awesome. We would only need to buy a washer (may need to replace the dryer in the long term) and some stuff like curtains and maybe a rug for downstairs. Now I don't know the area very well but it seems decent (not great but not a slum either, and I am still a student after all). And our mortgage guy lives like four blocks away so it must be a decent area eh? But did I mention we made an offer this afternoon after seeing it again this morning? I knew I should have spoken about it in length to some people this past weekend for opinions but the fiance (see how the word just rolls off... :-) ) didn't want to seriously consider it since it was the first place we saw. He was brought around to its awesome when we saw a couple of other places. *Continues freaking*

And man, I still have to book a caterer to go with my reception location since there is apparently a "rival couple" who had also been looking at our reception location (but we won darn it!) who may snatch them. And my desired (and the only decent one I can afford) videographer may be travelling on that date, and I need to pick a photographer, and.... Eeeeekkkkkk!

Whee! I update not so very much. And when (and where) do I write my next update? Why at work of course while waiting for a download of a program I need as well as waiting for a couple of people to come in to work. I’m a baaaaad person. So I was talking to my friend Cat on the weekend and said I would update my LJ soon so here it is (but still after a little bit of a wait). Awww, the tech guy came in and said that it would be at least an hour before the bloody thing downloads. Oh well, more time for writing!

( Moving on is hard to do… )

( The other stuff, i.e. don’t read if you don’t want to hear personal gossip about my relationship. )

Well, now that I’ve overshared about all the big stuff I will completely sum up all the little stuff. V for Vendetta is an awesome movie. I highly recommend it. It has its little flaws but overall, it’s damn good. House is also an awesome show and I swear the writers are toying with me, the bastards. Apparently first year University students cannot be trusted to put their names on the labs two people have forgot in the last two weeks. And I think that is all. Join us next time for the adventures of Kim, the grad student who found that she had to grow up.

When you can't remember your password. Oops? Luckily it only took a couple of tries. Why am I updating now you ask? Because it beats working on all of the other stuff I have to work on. And I do mean have to. I have a presentation for my thesis committee Tuesday afternoon and I have to show my slides to my supervisor tomorrow morning. I have approximately the correct number of slides but they're nowhere near finished yet. I also have to send a list of experiments I'm doing for two grade six classes on Thursday afternoon by tomorrow morning. And I'm totally watching the Oscars tonight. I'm the defending champ in my Oscar pool and I have to see if I can hang on to the title. Plus, Hello! Jon Stewart hosting! I don't think I need to say any more.

I actually had something resembling a life this weekend. It shocked me too. Friday night I had dance class and went to see a movie with James. Ultraviolet, the new comedy about... um, well I'm not really sure. And I think it was supposed to be an action movie. But it was so funny! Bloodless violence and crazy ass technology like hair and clothing that seems to just randomly change colour. It's mood clothing! Personally I would just want the mood hair but to each their own. Saturday evening we went to a dinner party at Mon's. It was quite fun. I got to meet one of her classmates and husband. Since it is the Maritimes, we discovered that we know many people in common. They're both funny and interesting and we all had a really fun time (I hope?) although I'm sure we paid Taboo much less than Mon would have liked. And tonight I went out for dinner with James. Also pretty decent. Of course the one thing I didn't do was work, which is sadly what I absolutely had to do. It could be a long night.

I also had a long discussion tonight with James about personal responsibility and why we as humans and a society are going to continue to go downhill unless more people believe that they can make a difference. Unfortunately I ended up feeling depressed as a result although that hasn't taken much the last couple of days. Right in the middle of an important work period is not the best time to finally have the mini breakdown that's been piling up. Maybe I'll try and post about the discussion later if I'm in a better mood. Now I'm off to reorder my slides.

( Dear Brain, )

( Dear David Emerson, )

( Dear ambition, )

( Dear supervisor, )

My brain would not let me sleep until I posted these. I don't know why it HATES ME! Need sleep before I become zombified (any further that is). I need to get a life. Won't someone do something fun with me? Vern, since you're graduating soon (cheers incidentally!) you should come here and we will cram for my comp dance the summer away. :)

And for some reason when I try to update this it keeps opening up rich text mode and screwing up my formatting. Bad LJ! I've been working on this post for a while now.

I finally heard back about my ISMRM abstract and it was rejected. Guess that means no trip to Seattle for me. I'm rather disappointed although I know it's not like it hasn't happened to lots of other people. One of Erin's abstracts was rejected last year. ( Oh where, oh where has my ambition gone... )

I was planning on making a mocking and scathing post and while some of my enthusiasm for that has gone, I will mock a couple of things. One: Peter McKay, the deputy leader of the Conservatives. What a whiny, whiny man. Waaaah, my girlfriend switched political affiliations away from the right wing nutjob. I'm so betrayed. Waaah. Now I must run home to Daddy. What a little Daddy's boy. He said he wouldn't merge with the Alliance if he gained leadership, and then what did he do? And apparently he made a really pathetic "joke" about Alexa McDonough and knitting that of course didn't go over well. And now, he probably won't even end up as deputy prime minister. Bah. But Peter, you do at least have something to look forward to. Since you weren't really leader of the Tories long, and you never ended up Prime Minister, you won't ever have to be on the second, and main object of my mocking: "The Next Great Prime Minister". No seriously, this is apparently going to be a show. And you know who the celebrity judges are? Brian Mulroney, Kim Cambell, and Joe Clark. No, seriously! I'm not joking, I swear. I thought it was a joke as well but no. This is what happens to former Tory prime ministers. And Liberal prime ministers that last only about two months cause apparently John Turner is also there (Sorry Paul, with your two years, you're no good). Gosh Steven Harper I hope you've got a good judges schtick picked out for the later seasons. The three American Idolesque roles are already taken. Unless you manage to knock out Joe Clark. Watch your back Joe! (I figure Brian is pretty good at covering his own ass) It's based off of a legitimate contest that some people may have heard of called the "As Prime Minister awards" that involved writing an essay for a chance at a scholarship. The page can be found here. It may have good intentions, but it sounds pathetic, at least in the sense that the judges are former prime ministers. Say what you will about former US presidents, at least some of them are off doing humanitarian work like winning Nobel prizes and trying to raise money for disaster aid, etc. This is what our former leaders do. Le sigh.

So I said that someday I would make a fandom post and it has finally arrived. ( Long fandom post ahead... )

( Why my love for fanfic? )

( Current fandoms ) It has eaten my brains I swear.

So we're speeding along the TransCanada in the dark on our way home for the weekend. My boyfriend is driving and he's not a very big fan of night driving. So you can guess how much fun this whole trip is. Especially since we spent about an hour from Truro to Amherst driving in a heavy amount of blowing snow. Booo weather! I'm bored and I know I haven't posted much to my blog in a while so I figured I'll write an entry here and drop it in livejournal when I get home. Wherever that is. It's funny, I still think of Fredericton as home to a certain extent. My parents and brother are there, as is most of the rest of the family like my grandparents. But when I leave, I think of the trip back to Hali as going home as well. My apartment is much more home than my former room is (it being Dad's office now). My kitty is in Hali, as is all of my stuff. But I'm not quite committed to it as home. I wonder if the feeling of Fredericton as home will ever go away.

( Movie time! )

( My own webpage? Wowsers! )

It took far too long to simply cut and paste this in. Mind you that could be due to me having to enter my password multiple times and then giving up and having them reset it so I could log in and change it again. Argh. Fandom post coming tomorrow I swear! It's all ready I just have to cut and paste it too.

Ah, it's Friday night and I'm sitting at home updating my blog. I am perhaps oh so pitiful. This fact is made worse by the knowledge that I spent the rest of the evening playing Final Fantasy X. Le sigh.

So I survived Christmas break. I feel that I should get a medal or something. I spent the week before Christmas frantically running around trying to be in three places at once and do Christmas shopping and errands for three people (myself, Mom, and Nanny). Not to mention that vicious cold thing that I was trying to get over. That only took over two friggin weeks. So I sort of careened into Christmas and the day itself wasn't too bad, although I will probably spend the next few years of my life cautiously avoiding my grandmother for fear of being asked why I haven't got "THE Diamond" yet (which will morph into other appropriate questions whenever I do get "THE Diamond", and yes, when my grandmother says it you can hear the caps lock). After Christmas wasn't too bad although I spent a remarkable amount of time being busy then as well. Apparently to actually get a vacation I will have to go far away from anyone who will ask me to do things (because I am unable to say no to anyone). Take getting together with my friends. While I'm very grateful that I got to see everyone before we scattered, possibly permantly to various locations across Canada (and Europe) I ended up doing something with them every night (which again, I didn't mind that much). But one night, I was sort of against planning something for and voiced my objections. Well, planning went on anyway and I sort of felt obliged to come to this pool thing. Other than James and I, only two people showed up. And one of those people had switched stuff around so he could make it. Eventually two others joined us a few hours later and I did really enjoy myself, but I just find it ironic that I, the one who was against it initially, and another person who warned me in advance he couldn't come (as opposed to everyone else who just didn't show up or told us at the last minute) were half of the people there for pool. Much of it is my own fault though. I'm unable to say no to people and I feel obliged to do things for people. Although there are some people who take advantage of it.

I'm finding I'm rather melancholy this new year and I don't know why. Overall, school is going well. The PhD transfer went through and hopefully Dal won't screw up the financial aspect of it (sends glare at Dal for good measure). I did pretty well on my course from last semester (although not as well as I'd hoped but I'm not apparently not allowed to complain about it) and I even tried to take this week off (although of course that didn't work). I just find I'm not content in my life right now. I'm not overly sure why but I find myself wishing I had more friends (or that the few friends I do have weren't so far away -- I swear to you Cat that I will get the money order thingy worked out by the end of next week) in town, I wish I weren't so overweight, I have romantic wishes, etc. Some of that is in my power (but I seem to have no willpower for) and I'll admit I'm lost on a couple of them (like the friends thing, I'm so bad at meeting people). Ah, but enough depression bits. I have good things, I prolly shouldn't complain. So I'll talk a bit about video games and movies.

I just started playing Final Fantasy X this week (I got it for Christmas 2004 but that's my spare time for you). I'm rather enjoying it but I haven't played many RPGs before (I can only think of two off the top of my head) and it's a little odd. It's got pretty pretty animation though. And I like the female characters in it, although the magic lady, Lulu, is wearing a dress held on solely by her ample cleavage. And it's not doing a very good job. Very funny though. But why are people always so cryptic? It's really not necessary. And subtle foreshadowing, really not their talent.

James and I also saw King Kong on Tuesday night. Pretty good but wayyyyy too long. It should not take an hour and 20 minutes to see the ape. And I'm pretty sure I shouldn't have been laughing as much as I did. And nobody seems to be scared of heights. At the end of the movie when Ann Darrow and Jack Driscoll are on the top of the Empire State Building, why are neither of them concerned about falling? There's no railing and they're really close to the edge. And she's wearing heels!! And there's this one scene with Kong and the dinosaurs and it's so obvious that when they were planning the scene the director and assocatiated fanboys were sitting around and someone said "I don't think one dinosaur is enough. That was so totally done in Jurassic Park. We need two giant dinosaurs!" This was of course followed by someone else going "No! Make it three!" And then someone else chimed in with: "And let's have another scene with a huge DINOSAUR stampede!" (And yes, they said dinosaur in all caps). I may post more funny bits from the movie tomorrow when I can be bothered to figure out the LJ cut.

However, I do actually have a decent, completely rational reason. Well, two reasons actually. The first weekend of December I went home. And what fun that was. Jokes, good cheer, fun galore... oh wait, that was a silly Christmas movie wasn't it. My weekend was nothing but pure running all the way. My mom is laid up after having a knee replacement, my grandfather was in Saint John in the hospital after having a heart attack, my dad was trying to balance between the two and doing the chores and my brother was sick. So I became everyone's bitch. Now don't get me wrong, I don't mind doing stuff for my family and helping them out. I like spending time with my Mom and I really don't mind making her bed or fetching her stuff, or even driving my grandmother around. It's sort of fun. But spending my entire weekend careening around the city madly with a lovely day trip to Saint John (and Saint George as well, you would not believe my luck) on Sunday. And this on top of a pile of work I needed to get done. So fine, I figure I can get all the marking done in the car on Sunday and the way back Tuesday and get a decent chunk of one of my presentations done. And I did. And I had about six days over which to finish one presentation, write another one, and write a 15 page paper. Tricky, but doable. I probably wouldn't sleep one or two of those nights but I could probably get everything done well. And then the room started spinning. Literally. I woke up several times Tuesday night to have the room start spinning madly when I moved my head a certain way. I had fluid in my ear? Striking coincidence, considering that my brother had an ear and sinus infection when I was home. And it would only get worse from there. By Friday, day two of my presentations, I could barely speak. And that of course was the 30 min talk day. By Friday night I felt like a truck had hit me. I have been incredibly sick over the past few days. Massive headaches (last night was well into the migraine territory), trouble swallowing, stuffed head, dizziness, plugged and runny nose, pain in throat and miscellaneous aches and pains. I have not slept well since... I'm not sure. I didn't even sleep that well when I was home but it was much better than I've been having the past few days. I've been up since 4am. I didn't get to bed till after 11. And the other nights have been similar. Blech. And I still had to write that 15 page paper this past weekend. It's done, but I seriously doubt it's any good. I must say though, my caring is less than it usually is though. And I still need to shop this week and make soap stuff and my BPAL stuff doesn't look like it's going to get here for Christmas let alone in time for me to use it for the soaps. And waaaah!!!

This actually did make me feel better and I apologize to those who did read it. It's just sucks to be sick with so much work and I'm sure that my boyfriend (who has been a real prince this weekend) is tired of listening to me pout and sniffle.

/End rant

In cute and funny news, my cat is trying to eat our tiny little three foot something Christmas tree. And it's plastic. But she doesn't seem to either care, or notice, or she figures that the next branch she eats will somehow become real. How do you stop a cat from chewing on a fake Christmas tree? Shouldn't they stop on their own? Or does she figure "Hey, it's the season for miracles. It could turn into a pine any second now..." Turning on the little miny lights didn't deter her, even after I'm sure she ended up shoving one up her nose by accident.

PS Cat (my person friend, not the previously mentioned slightly dimwitted feline), if you're reading this I got your prezzie when I was home. Excellent timing and I love it lots!! My brother loves the shirt although he does not deserve it any more. I'll call you as soon as I can speak again and I'll try to mail your present in a day or two. It won't arrive before Christmas but hopefully it won't be too late.

ETA Ack it's snowing! But I need to go to the clinic! And hand in my paper! Curse you...

*Flails uncontrollably* Less than two weeks till everything is due! OMG I'm so screwed! I have a project presentation due next Thursday for a project I'm not even close to finishing, a grad seminar I have to give (30 minutes long) that I have barely started and will require a decent amount of work, labs to mark, and a report for said project presentation. And some random invigilating thrown in. And a visit home this weekend, and I never get any work done on visits home. *Flails some more* And Christmas is approaching and I'm supposed to be making gifts as well as the standard shopping. *Runs around in a circle and collapses while still flailing* And yet, I've been stupid enough lately to keep taking breaks to re-play Mario Sunshine and I went to see Rent tonight. Lovely music incidentally. Mmm, Broadway on screen. With hot men and pretty ladies that can sing like nobody's business. I love it when Hollywood takes a hint and does something smart like keeping the original Broadway cast for a movie instead of recasting it with people like Justin Timberlake (apparently they were actually considering this oh yes). I'll leave anyone who likes musicals a chance to recoil in horror. Must go listen to Broadway songs to ease my mind.

Oh, and *Flails!*

That is all.

Except for the facts that the Fireside in Halifax has pretty pretty atmosphere and watching the Santa Claus parade while in a moderately snarky mood is fun. Especially while doing it with friends. Because you get to make comments like: "Ah, yes what a very traditional Christmas carol. I haven't heard this one in a while" whilst listening to a float blasting out Sweet Home Alabama. As James said, what a classic.

Warning: Skip this entry if you don't want to read my whining.

This week has been really crazy. From invigilating two exams in the evening meaning I didn't get home until after 8:30 two nights, several long days at the lab, one long night and lots of other things like a project update presentation on a project that I haven't even finished much of. And certainly didn't work on this weekend. I felt so blah this weekend that I didn't get any homework done. And I really need to work on that project. I have to go home this weekend because my grandfather had a heart attack last week. I don't really have time this weekend, especially since there's a thesis defense I need to attend Friday afternoon and I have to TA the Monday afternoon. But I do think I should go. So to sum up, this is a whiny entry. Very whiny.

I'll try and post an entry in a day or two and talk about the Santa Claus parade that we went to this weekend. It was cold out but pretty fun.

No, really! Why isn't it the middle of December yet? I haven't updated for a week because I've been so busy. There was a presentation I gave on Tuesday at Radiology research day, the assignment due tomorrow, my thesis project, experiments for an abstract that's due on Wednesday, and programming for my class project. As well as the normal TA hours. I am so tired. Even now, I can't think of anything smart or funny to say. My spunk has been sucked out. In what little spare time I've had this weekend, I've been watching Jem on dvd. That's right, Jem. We saw it in Video difference while we were looking for a movie Friday night and I couldn't resist indulging in a little nostalgia. I remember it being a cute and fun tv series. I blame it completely on the fact that I was a stupid little 5 or 6 year old. I cannot, for the life of me, fathom what I saw in it. I mean sure, there's the suspension of disbelief that is required for most cartoons but there's just so much that's so ridiculous. The bad guys keep destroying things and kidnapping Jem and the Holograms as well as setting shit on fire, turning on explosions and setting bombs. And do they call the police. No. In fact, when one of the characters actually does suggest it, Jem turns to her and says "No, we'll just outsing them. Then they'll learn!" Right then. Good teaching of the morals. It's completely illogical. Cute occasionally but really, well, outrageous. And I swear, if I don't get this stupid song out of my head soon, I will go insane.

Maybe some cheesy disaster movie tonight will help perk me up.